What you say is important. How you say it is more important.
Back in my college teaching days, my favourite module to teach was on non-verbal communication (NVC). I would start the class by delivering a short energetic rant in French. The students always looked non plussed, given that English was the standard language of instruction, but I knew what I was doing. And, once I explained myself, so did they. In an oral situation, communication is delivered by three components: the words we speak, the body language we use, and the tone we employ. After I had finished my rant in French, I would ask the students if they knew what I had been saying. Most usually, the would say no, they had no idea. Then I would ask them if they could tell whether I was happy or sad or what. That they knew: I was clearly angry, they said. How could they know that if they didn’t understand what I was saying? Well, they would say, your voice was raised, your hand was pointing, and your face was animated. Indeed. My tone and my body language gave it all away; even without ...