A 10-point TO DO list for after my mother dies
1. Feel the relief that comes with the peaceful end of my mother’s life. She was so ready, so grateful to have my sister and me here, so present during the close of her days. 2. Receive the messages that arrive as emails, phone calls, texts, FB comments, and in-person conversations. The reaching out by others is welcome, appreciated, invaluable. 3. Plan the celebration of her life. With chocolate cake and heartfelt words. 4. Enjoy the warmth and love present for Mum among those who attended the Celebration in person and in spirit. This ritual coming together to mourn and to celebrate our splendid mother is a marker on the way into the next months — important to organize, comforting to experience. 5. Speak freely of Mum every chance I have. She lives on in the stories I tell and the stories I hear. 6. Dive into packing up the things that surrounded her. They are just things without our splendid mother to animate them through her use of them. Even her clothes just hang, lifeless, m