Grow tomatoes, don't be a world-class jerk
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| Our tomatoes, last week |
How to grow a tomato
How not to be a world-class jerk
How to grow a tomato
Plan in winter
Plant in spring
Tend in summer
Eat in autumn
Of course, it doesn’t actually ever go like that,
it goes more like this:
The planning in winter is ideal, the mind-image perfection.
The planting in spring gets delayed because of climate-change-odd weather.
The tending in summer is complicated by other commitments, more enticing than watering, pruning, weeding.
The eating — well, that happens, regardless; the culmination of bounty or scarcity, whatever the fruit on the vine.
Whether red and sun-ripe or green and brown-paperbag-prayers,
the tomatoes find their way to my enjoyment, alimentation, appreciation...
inspiring the seeds, already, of next year’s crop.
***
How not to be a world-class jerk
It’s simple:
Be kind.
Be nice.
Be polite.
Don’t be mean; it’s nasty.
Don’t tell us who to trade with; that’s our decision, always.
Don’t call our official languages a trade barrier; it shows your ignorance of our history and your disdain for our culture.
Beware…
the seeds you plant today —
we’ll weed the worst;
we’ll snip the shoots; but
Don’t be mean; it’s nasty.
Don’t tell us who to trade with; that’s our decision, always.
Don’t call our official languages a trade barrier; it shows your ignorance of our history and your disdain for our culture.
Beware…
the seeds you plant today —
we’ll weed the worst;
we’ll snip the shoots; but
we’ll tend those that feed our spirit; and
we’ll train the stems we choose — those that tie us close
we’ll train the stems we choose — those that tie us close
from coast to coast to coast.
We are Canada:
We are Canada:
one country,
holding nations,
holding peoples,
together across the seasons.
together across the seasons.
Inspired to gather and plan, already,
for next year and the next and on into the future,
for next year and the next and on into the future,
et en français,
the world-class jerk choking on our poussière.
the world-class jerk choking on our poussière.
NOTE: For context about who the world-class jerk might be, watch Prime Minister Mark Carney's eloquent news-conference response to the 11th-hour rupture (by Canada) of the recent Canada-US trade talks.
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Land acknowledgement: I respectfully recognize that I live on the original lands of Anishinaabe, Cree, Oji-Cree, Dakota and Dene peoples, and on the homeland of the Métis Nation.
I am so ashamed, heartbroken, and thoroughly pissed at the Orange bastard.
ReplyDeleteMaybe next year.
For tomatoes, too
We have been lucky. Our tomatoes have been ripening for about a month now. Even tariffs and grotesque politicians cannot take my tomatoes away. :)
ReplyDeleteThere was so much rain earlier this year, with the sun finally shining into my garden, my annuals are now doing beautifully. The vines and ferns have exploded with growth. I love your ode to rump, although we know it's an impossible goal for him.
ReplyDeleteMy tomatoes are flourishing and rosy, not orange and rotting like trump
ReplyDeleteAll I can offer is sincere apologies; the mentally ill should not be running the country. And here we in the lower 48 are. As far as tomatoes. I can offer a box load of recipes for green tomatoes. Peace -- love will prevail.
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing how the vine tomato is causing us to be so creative this week! Smart use of words. I wish you and your crop well. I gave up growing, or trying to grow my own some time ago. Thank goodness I can handle them on the kitchen side of things. Thank you Amanda!
ReplyDeleteI don’t grow tomatoes anymore but I am proud to be a French Canadian and I want to remain so.
ReplyDeleteThank you for this post.