A Post a Day in May 2019 #25: Grateful, with eyes wide open

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I have pledged to write a new post for this blog every day in May. 

Life is good. I enjoy the sunrise every morning. My little family wakes up, we make our individual ways through the day, then gather together to share a meal, do a few chores and enjoy each other’s loving companionship. 

Good and easy
Life is good, but it’s not the life I had pictured. It’s quieter. The horizon is a bit closer than I had thought it might be as I head towards 60. And the potential for adventure is smaller than it was 25 years ago. 

Life is good, and I am grateful for the love and security I have. But it is a different life than I had envisioned it being at this stage. 

My partner’s original breast cancer diagnosis more than 20 years ago put us on the road to ‘different’, but it was the recurrence in 2013 that moved us into the fast lane. We are, without question, grateful that surgery, chemo, radiation and follow-up drugs treated the cancer. Being alive is good. But we are alive with our eyes wide open, and we see — every day — the impact that the treatment has had on Val’s body.
Good and different

Without a body, we are nothing. When the body we have simply cannot do the bidding we want, then life is, by its very definition, different than expected, than planned. Speaking only for myself, understanding of this comes slowly and acceptance of this comes even more slowly. But come it does. Sometimes wholly, sometimes only in fragments hard to keep hold of. But it comes. 

Today, I mark another day of my good life. Different than it might have been, and good, very good, nonetheless. I’m holding onto that thought and I’m getting on with my day. 

Thanks for reading. 



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Comments

  1. FintaMay 25, 2019 at 5:45 AM

    Some days I wonder when I got old, why my infrastructure betrayed me. I dream I can walk without a cane or walker, can dig in the dirt all day and plant seeds, pick up a baby and carry him on my hip. Different is right. It's a "welcome to Holland" moment.
    "

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